How I fell in love with my wife

I can’t remember when Kira and I met because I can’t remember a time when we didn’t know each other. We both attended the same school since pre-Kindergarten so we officially met at age four or five. However, it wasn't until the tenth grade that I knew there was a chemistry between us as we would smile wry smiles at each other when our science teacher would say something unintentionally hilarious. Our shared sense of humor showed me that we had an unusual bond which eventually led to us dating early in our senior year of high school.

In just that short sliver of time at the end of high school I knew I was in love with her. I believe that one is in love when that other person makes you feel comfortable enough with yourself to be exactly who you are. Furthermore, I think that only when we can behave the way we want to without shame or doubt, we can truly love ourselves. In other words, one is in love with someone when that person allows you to fully love yourself.

Just as I find it difficult to determine when our friendship changed into romance, I struggle to identify when romance slipped into love. However, there was a classic high school scenario during which I think that transition took place. In high school I loved driving by myself in my car because I could sing along to my favorite songs and fantasize about being that performer without having to worry about the judgments of others. However, whenever I would drive with someone in the passenger seat I could barely squeak out a note for fear of sounding off-pitch or just plain annoying. For reasons I could never completely understand, I have always felt comfortable enough to sing in my full voice loudly around her. Perhaps it’s the honesty and openness with which she approaches the world that made me feel this way. Maybe it’s the non-judgmental attitude that she exudes that allowed me to feel free to sing without fear. Whatever the quality, I knew that Kira allowed me to do and feel and be the person I wanted to be. I knew I was falling in love.

In the same way that I was able to sing without fear back in high school, today I feel just as empowered to speak my mind, to hold an unusual opinion, or strive for things just outside my grasp. She remains an inexhaustible source of support and a constant endorser of even my most ridiculous ambitions.

Some women are kind. Some women are brave. Some women are intrepid. Kira is all of these things by her very nature. These elements, combined with that impossible-to-define-quality she possesses that brings out the real me, have kept me helplessly and hopelessly in love with her. Every day we spend together, no matter how quiet and small our experience may seem to others, I feel like I am singing at the top of my lungs.